September 7, 2010
I happen to be acquainted with a real-live genius. Not the kind of genius with knowledge or abilities in some theoretical, esoteric area that may "change the face of science." But rather the kind of genius who can listen to me drone on about my life, with its ups and downs, tears and hurt, and distill the actual issues down to a few, succinct words. With the help of this genius, I have figured out that in the past year, I have lost all control over my life, and that I have trouble dealing with that loss of control.
Those of you who know me well will chuckle at that last part and say to yourselves, "duh, I knew that about you. I'm a genius, too." Ah, but if that were the end, it wouldn't be so impressive. No, the next step is the key. I have, with the help of the genius, put into action, a plan to identify individual stressors and figure out how to deal with them. This past week, I have been struggling with the feeling that nothing I can do will lasso this out-of-control life back into the barn. But it turns out that there are things I can do.
I have trouble asking for help, but I can't do everything. So this weekend, I asked a friend to help me with the yard. Because I don't want to have to depend on others all the time, I asked my friend to teach me how to use all the yard tools. AND I HAD SO MUCH FUN!! I used the edger, the weed wacker, the mower and the blower! I also used the electric trimmer on the holly bushes and think I may have a special skill in this area. I had always feared the edger, because the thought of a spinning metal blade coming in contact with the cement was terrifying. As it turns out, it's not all that bad, AND you get a nice spark as a bonus. So, I plan to keep taking care of the yard, because it's a whole lot easier to find someone to hold Jack for a few hours, than to do the yard work. I'm feeling VERY independent and empowered, and this weekend, I plan to hang a curtain rod, and may even try to change out a faucet!
Speaking of Jack... What a week! This kid is a great sleeper. Sometimes. He again had trouble sleeping on Sunday night. Perhaps he is developing a dislike of the workweek already? He also tries to avoid naps during the day, as if he's worried he'll miss something if he goes to sleep. So we continue to work on the schedule. It takes 21 days to change a habit, so Jack still has two weeks, or so, to master the schedule.
Jack is developing quite the personality, too! Each morning he wakes me up with his fussing, and I walk down to his room. I turn on the lights, and as I walk toward his bed, I imagine that he slowly sees my face as it appears above him. Once I see him, I say "Good Morning, Jack!" and he smiles up at me, stretching and laughing, as if it's the most exciting event ever. It's such a wonderful thing to see every morning! And throughout the day, he continues to charm every person he encounters. This kid is going to be a heartbreaker!
Well, I did have a few pictures to share, but I couldn't find the cord to transfer the photos from the camera to the laptop. I will find that soon and make sure to give you a few extra to make up for it! Jack is continuing to grow and change everyday, and I continue to be in awe of this little person that I made. I can't wait to see what the rest of week holds for us!
Love
Maggie
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